May 10, 2010

Chapter 13

Maddie opened her hotel room door prepared to tiptoe in. The she heard laughing.

“Dum dumdumdum, dum dumdumdum…” Erin waved her hands like a conductor as she sang, ‘Here Comes the Bride’ to Maddie’s entrance.

The scene was pandemonium. Clothes were everywhere, suitcases tipped over onto the floor. Hair appliance cords spiderwebbed across the room. A row of empty water bottles stood testament to recovery from the night before.

And feet. Maddie saw feet sticking out the bottom of one bed. BIG feet. Attached to a big guy. Jordan Staal, dead asleep and snoring lightly, was sprawled out face down across one of the beds.

“At least someone covered his ass this time,” Maddie observed.

Deanne’s head popped out of the bathroom. “That was me. But I can’t wake him.” She came over and pushed his leg as hard as she could. “I think we should call Max. He seems like he’s know what to do, right?” She picked up the phone.

“Can I have Max Talbot’s room, please?” She frowned, and put her hand over the receiver. “There’s no Max Talbot registered.”

Cynthia rolled her eyes. “Ask for a Mr. Superstar,” she suggested.

“Ummm, do you have a Max Superstar registered?” Deanne made a face, then quickly smiled. “Thanks!” She nodded as the call was connected.

Cynthia made a gagging noise and pretended to hang herself.

“You are a piece of work, Frenchie,” Deanne said. “Jordan is dead. Or hibernating. We can’t wake him and we’re really hungry.” She listened, then giggled. “That will NOT work.” Pause. “I don’t even want to know how you know that.” Pause. “Okay, I’ll call you back if it doesn’t.” She hung up and turned toward the girls.

“You might want to go in the hall for a minute.”

Laughing, Erin, Cynthia and Maddie backed into the hall. Once the door was shut, Erin spun around.

“You are NOT wearing that shirt!” She said, pulling Maddie around backwards.

“He gave it to me!” Maddie shrieked. “It was that or my dress, and the dress looks like a comforter in a whorehouse.” She looked down at herself.

Baggy #87 Pens t-shirt, mesh gym shorts, too-big flip flops. Sidney had pointed out that wearing sweats with heels was probably as bad as wearing her dress home. Too right, she knew. Then he’d joked about later, when she should wear just the #87 shirt and heels alone. Shiver.

Her thought was broken by Deanne cracking open the door. “He’s up,” she said. Her hair was completely disheveled again, and her shorts were gone. They went in.

Jordan was sitting up in bed, blanket around his waist and big smile on his face. “My harem has returned!” He looked right at Maddie. “Nice shirt,” he said. Then busted out laughing.

“Man, that kid has some luck. Even with an ass like his, he still gets his girl.”

“Get out of my room, Jordan Staaaaaaaaaaaaaaal,” Erin sang, and Cynthia joined in. Maddie stuck her tongue out at him.

“You asked for it,” he said, then stood up. No clothes, no blankets. The girls all dove for cover. He spent a good long time looking for his shorts. “Not under here,” he said lifting up a magazine. “How about… nope.” He looked behind the TV.

“Look between the bed and the wall,” Erin suggested.

“Oh yeah,” he said, picking them up. “I forgot about that!” He pulled them on – red with Hawaiian flowers. He found his pants and shirt, then pulled on his shoes. When he was done, he grabbed Deanne, lifted her a foot off the floor, pressed her to the wall and kissed her. “See you at breakfast.” He bounded out of the room.

Deanne slid down the wall – all the way down till she was sitting on the floor. Looking up at the girls, she said, “You have NO idea.”

Maddie showered quickly and pulled her wet curls into the same updo trick from the night before. Deanne tugged her from the bathroom by an arm.

“Roll call,” she demanded. “Two minute version of everything that happened last night. Go.” She pointed at Erin.

“Geno made me do 40 shots of vodka and named me honorary Russian. We ate pizza, then fell asleep watching a movie. In separate beds. He’s a sweetie, and so fun. But that’s it. He wouldn’t let me go upstairs with Max.” She gave a little fake pout. “No really, I had a blast.”

Deanne pointed at Cynthia.

“I won $950 at craps.” She smiled, then blushed. “And Kris talks in French in his sleep.” They all squealed and jumped on Cynthia. “He has more expensive shampoo than I do.”

Deanne leaped up and re-assumed her drill sergeant pose. “Scale of 1 to 10.”

“Two hundred and eleven.” More squealing.

“And you, young lady?” They all turned to Maddie.

Maddie ticked off her fingers. “I ran off some puck bunnies. I did NOT have sex with Sidney Crosby. But I did agree to go to the NHL Awards with him today.”

“THANK GOD!” The girls all said at once. Maddie didn’t get it.

“They all asked us,” Erin said. “But we had zero idea what Sid was doing, so Max of course said he would love to take you so we could all go. We were so excited, but we didn’t want it to be weird for you, and we figured you could just meet him inside once we were all there…”

Maddie put a hand out. “He asked me to GO with him. Red carpet and all.”

They all froze. Then screamed.


Maddie doubled over laughing. “I gave him one condition, though. I told him he has to introduce me to Mario, and Mario has to approve this little plan. Turns out maybe Mario wants Sid out there more than even Sid does. So we’ll see what happens.”

“You are dead meat, sister,” Cynthia said. “You are going to be Mrs. Captain Canada by dinnertime.”

They hustled up to finish getting dressed. Maddie put on denim Capri pants and a bright salmon colored henly t-shirt with the top buttons open over a white tank top. Then she put on Sid’s flip flops.

Deanne came in while she was smudging on a little eyeliner.

“Really, no sex?” D whispered. “What’s that about?”

“It was great, actually. He’s really sweet. He was afraid I’d think he was treating me like a starstruck puckbunny.” She turned. “And to be honest, I was afraid that’s what I was being. So neither of us let that happen. We made out and got a little naked, but then we slept. And it wasn’t weird this morning.”

Deanne had a big, shit-eating grin on her face. “Amazing. You don’t have sex and it’s better than having sex.”

"Well," Maddie smiled at herself in the mirror. "That remains to be seen."

1 comment:

  1. “It was that or my dress, and the dress looks like a comforter in a whorehouse.”

    ^ Funniest thing ever!